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You talked about wanting to be invisible and wanting to hide from threats, but that doesn't feel like an identity so much as a defense mechanism. Your identity is something that comes from within. It's not how others perceive you, but how you perceive yourself. Even feeling a connection or disconnect with others is an emotion rather than who you are.
I have a pretty good guess as to the reason why you are so hypervigilant around others, and I'm sorry you had to go through that kind of stuff. I truly feel for you and I wish you the best.