Vampires...What the hell are they?

Well, in short, vampires are just like many other kinds of kin. We have an energy condition that requires us to feed; either from energy, or from the energy in blood. Other types of Kin that have or could have this condition are: Leannan Sidhe, some were kin, and a few others.

Vampires are not "blood fiends," "soul suckers," or any of the other nasty terms that have been thrown about. We are not evil, or even negative nessesarily. WE DO NOT REQUIRE SLAYING! We are normal kin that have an energy requirement that other's don't have.

How do we feed? Well Sanguinarian Vampires (blood drinking vampires) feed by selecting a special person or group of people called donors (the key word here being DONOR). Donors are carefully screened for disease, as is the sang vampire, before feeding ever takes place. Energy vampires, or Psyvamps, feed by taking in the energy of a person, or a group of people. We can also feed ambiently, this means feeding from group energy, and not from any one person; or feeding from natural sources...air, fire, water, earth, trees, get the point, we can feed from anything.

Everyone has a vampire story. These stories usially have to do with a solitary vampire biting the neck of somebody in a club somewhere. Urban legend. Real vampires don't do this. We are a very secretive bunch of people, and we tend to keep our condition secret for reasons of safety. That's what it really is, folks, a condition. No beautiful vampire bit my neck and drained my blood. This is not the world of Anne Rice or Poppy Z. Brite. This is the real world. Vampires are not a threat to the safety of the earth, we do not generally consort with demons. Vampires are not diseased, we're not evil, we don't have an aversion to garlic, or crosses, or whatever.

Most distressingly, are the Slayers, or Hunters. People who think that vampires should be watched and our population carefully kept low. To these people I would say, GET A LIFE! Every day I meet normal humans that I think should be forceably euthanised. That doesn't give me the right to kill someone just because they're human.

I have been asked the following questions so often that I get a headache just thinking about it...

Do vampires really have fangs?: I dunno, some do I guess. I don't, most don't.

Do vampires have special powers?: I can't answer for any of my brethren, but since I've awakened my sense of smell has gotten incredibly acute, my psychic senses have become stronger. I cannot however, throw anything through a brick wall (that would be cool though, wouldn't it?) I can also sense another vampire near me very acurately. We CAN be killed by a stake through the heart...everybody that that WOULDN'T kill raise a hand...that's what I thought. We don't burn in the sunlight, though our eyes are very sensitive to it. Holy water doesn't harm us. The only thing that tends to hurt me, personally, is an Abba song on the radio...Again, who doesn't that hurt?

Do vampires sleep in coffins?: Ew! Gross!

Do vampires need to feed to stay healthy?: Yes, absolutely yes.

If you piss off a vampire will they try to hurt you?: Yes, run away! (Is this question for real!?)

Do we dress in vicotorian style clothing and walk around outside like that?: Please! I'm gay, I wear fabulous clothes, but not THAT fabulous! What do we do with our victims?: Well, first we mix up a nice batch of hollandaise. (this is another one of those questions that make me want to scream...) In short, Vampires are just like you, except we dress better, and we have better oral care.

The topic of vampires and what we do has gotten extremely out of hand in the Kin community. I jumped at the chance that magpie gave me to write this article, because I feel that true information about us can at times be scarce. So I hope I helped with my diatribe, and I also hope that I have hopelessly confused those of you that will continue to believe in the old myths.